(An excerpt from Tom Purcell's new book, "Comical Sense: A Lone Humorist Takes on a World Gone Nutty!")"Who the heck cares about a bunch of guys playing footsie with a little ball?"
At their convention, Texas Republicans compared immigrants to terrorists, claimed therapy can cure homosexuality, and insisted that the only thing a rape survivor has the right to choose is to stay home and raise her child. A zombie hunting for brains would have starved in Fort Worth, but the dumbest thing to come out of their convention wasn't in the program, but from the mouth of the state's next Agriculture Commissioner, Sid Miller.
RUSSELL - The culmination of a three-month long undercover drug investigation by the Russell County Sheriff's Office concluded on Monday with the arrest of three suspects.
RUSSELL - A foster parent was arrested Thursday in charges of possession of marijuana and endangering a child, Russell County Sheriff John Fletcher announced.
Free elementary Spanish classes are going on this summer at First Congregational United Church of Christ, 3400 21st St., Great Bend.
Grace Lutheran Church in Lyons will host the 50th anniversary of the ordination and installation of the Rev. Lester H. Dumer on Sunday, June 29. Dumer was pastor at Grace Lutheran Church from June 28, 1964, until 1972. He will be preaching the sermon at the 4:30 p.m. service on June 29.
The next Breakout in Worship will be at 7 tonight at Perkins Restaurant, 2920 10th St. in Great Bend. Worship will be led by Christina Ball and the message will be delivered by the Rev. David Spare of Larned.
First Presbyterian Church and First Christian UCC Church in Great Bend are joining forces to reach out in mission. Both Barton County Emergency Aid and Fair Trade producers will benefit from sales today (Friday) and Saturday at the First Presbyterian Church, 24th and Washington.
Great Bend Fire/EMS
Before the World Cup, Uruguay was worried about Luis Suarez's knee and Colombia was fretting over injured Radamel Falcao. Considering the wild celebrations Thursday, neither should have.
DETROIT - With his team in need of a victory and an anxious crowd waiting, Joe Nathan took the mound and struck out the last three hitters of the game.
HAYS - The Thomas More Prep Marian held back the Great Bend Class AAA American Legion baseball team on Wednesday evening.
LARNED - Pick your sport, defense wins championships.
KANSAS CITY, Mo. - The Kansas City Chiefs will head into training camp next month with just as many questions as they had in their first season under Andy Reid.
An attempted fraud was reported to the Barton County Sheriff's Office on Tuesday. Someone called a Barton County resident saying her grandson was in trouble in New Mexico and needed help. The woman hung up before finding out what kind of "help" was wanted, and instead called her grandson, who said he was fine.
Great Bend Fire/EMS
MINNEAPOLIS - Derek Jeter soaked in the adulation from fans and players during one more night on baseball's national stage, set the tone for the American League with a pregame speech and delivered two final All-Star hits.
BESANCON, France - With defending champion Chris Froome and two-time winner Alberto Contador out of the race, the path is wide open for Vincenzo Nibali to become the first Italian to win the Tour de France since the late Marco Pantani in 1998.
Dwyane Wade is staying with the Miami Heat, and his latest deal is designed to give both the player and the only franchise he's ever known some flexibility in the coming years.
TOPEKA - Walmart and the Walmart Foundation announced that over the last fiscal year they gave more than $8.7 million in cash and in-kind contributions to charitable organizations throughout Kansas. Globally, the company and its Foundation donated more than $1.3 billion to non-profit groups, surpassing the previous year's total by more than $244 million.
Great Bend Fire/EMS
ELLINWOOD - Ellinwood Farmers Market will begin Tuesday, July 22 from 5:30 p.m. until 7:30 p.m. at the American Legion parking lot. Fresh vegetables (in season) available. All bakers, craftsmen, artisans and more are invited to come to sell and showcase.
HOISINGTON - Hoisington Food Bank volunteers and board have been named as the 118th Annual Labor Day Parade Grand Marshals, the Hoisington Chamber of Commerce announced earlier this week.
ELLINWOOD - Sentinel Gallery will present an Art Opening for the exhibition Who Knew? Art Exhibition Showcasing Art with Ellinwood Roots, taking place at 201 South Main on from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. on July 18.
ELLINWOOD -Ellinwood School/Community Library will be closed for cleaning July 22- 25. It will reopen on July 28.
Star of Hope is proud to announce the dedication of the new church building in Hesse, Haiti. The original church building was rendered useless and unsafe by the 2010 earthquake that devastated Haiti. On June 28, more than 250 people gathered in the new mountain church to dedicate it to the use of the people in the area. The church is located next to the new Hesse School also rebuilt since the 2010 earthquake. In addition to being used for church services it will also be used by the school for assemblies.
LAS CRUCES, N.M. - Leonard Loraine Mullenix, 94, died July 13 at his home in Las Cruces, N.M. He was born Dec. 9, 1919 at Chase, the son of George and Lola (Fuson) Mullenix.