By the time you read this, the world's billion-plus Roman Catholics may have a new pope. And when the black smoke of Tuesday's indecisive first vote has turned to the white smoke of final decision, don't be surprised if the cardinals have chosen... a Catholic pope.
Imagine U.S. Senators Joe Manchin of West Virginia and Jon Tester of Montana attacking fellow Democrats Diane Feinstein, Chuck Schumer and Richard Blumenthal over their unconstitutional gun control proposals. Further, envision Manchin granting an interview with conspiratorial radio talk show host Alex Jones, during which the senator calls Feinstein, Schumer and Blumenthal "wacko birds." Picture the harrumphing that would emanate from the elite media...
Our own increasingly secretive Kansas Legislature continues to ponder bills that would curtail the release of what is now considered public information.
A national political star is born. Kentucky's' Republican Senator Rand Paul became the political Justin Beiber of libertarians everywhere and a role model for GOPers who want to grab media attention by staging a dramatic "talking filibuster." And, suddenly, Republicans who had steadfastly resisted the idea of bringing back talking filibusters were falling all over themselves to get involved and praise it.
HOLLYWOOD - God bless America, and how's everybody?
Last week, Best Buy joined Yahoo to ban employees from telecommuting - a subject on which I am becoming an expert.
When Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) speaks to the Conservative Political Action Conference next week in Washington, it won't be a keynote, it'll be a coronation. Sick of sellouts, movement conservatives have fallen hard for Cruz. The Red State blog dubbed him a "national hero" and a "great patriot" for his first two months in the Senate. Retired Sen. Jim DeMint vouched for Cruz as the real deal:
Some fancy-dancy public-policy think-tank just released a brand-new study that speculates the legion of aging baby boomers will permanently redefine retirement. Mainly because so few of us will be able to afford to retire. "Uh, lady, you want lids on these?" Fast-food break rooms equipped with CPR paddles. A forest of tennis ball-footed walkers leaning against the brooms and mops by the back door. Intra-generational minimum wage squabbles: "Hey you punks, get your greasy hot apple pie holes off my oxygen tank."
Senate Democrats are finally beginning the process of writing a budget after four years of dereliction. They will almost certainly include some changes to Medicare, the largest driver of federal spending and debt. But unfortunately, there are indications that they intend to focus on the small piece of Medicare (10.6 percent in 2012) that is actually working well: the Medicare Part D prescription drug program.
International Women's Day is March 6 and is celebrated all through the weekend by many around the world. In the U.S., the day complements a month-long recognition of women through Women's History Month.
According to ABC News, you should probably get ready for a take-no-prisoners "This is your brain on nougat" campaign.
HOLLYWOOD - God bless America, and how's everybody?
As one who frequently works from home, I believe Yahoo's Marissa Mayer has seriously erred in removing that option for her staff. I've kept a diary of my productivity, and I'm forwarding this rundown of a typical day to Ms. Mayer, urging her to reconsider.
An old vaudeville joke went like this: "Do I look like an idiot? Do I look like a jerk who doesn't know what's going on? Do you think I'm dumb? Don't answer that!"
"All right," said my mother, standing before the members of the U.S. Senate, "it's time for you to get your act together."
Just sit right back and you'll endure a tale...
Domestic violence just doesn't happen on elevators.
On November 30th, voters in Switzerland will head to the polls to vote in a referendum on gold. On the ballot is a measure to prohibit the Swiss National Bank (SNB) from further gold sales, to repatriate Swiss-owned gold to Switzerland, and to mandate that gold make up at least 20 percent of the SNB's assets. Arising from popular sentiment similar to movements in the United States, Germany, and the Netherlands, this referendum is an attempt to bring more oversight and accountability to the SNB, Switzerland's central bank.
Labor Day marks the traditional start of the autumn campaign season, and the biggest question is whether President Obama will sink his party. Since the fight for the Senate is being waged largely in the red states - where Obama has always been deemed toxic - it's no wonder that Democratic candidates are behaving as if he has a communicable disease.
Miraculously, President Obama has conjured a strategy to wipe the Islamic State from the face of the Earth!
One of the dumbest points of contention in modern politics is the Big Government vs. Small Government one. It's a fake debate, only meaningful to the privileged: investors, business executives and their cronies. To everyday Americans it's a lofty, largely academic concept. Yet we've been duped into caring about it.
Happy Wednesday, everybody, and God bless America.
Whither the Islamic State? That's a real double-edged question: where is the group otherwise known as ISIS headed, and can the United States and other civilized nations make it shrivel up and die? The group is and has taken off like a bat out of hell, gobbling up territory and becoming a virtual murder machine.
Dec. 7, 1941: An aide enters the Oval Office with grim news for President Barack Obama.
There are a lot of offensive ways to observe 9/11. A yoga studio near DC offered a 20 percent off sale ("9 + 11 = 20 PERCENT OFF!"), and a sex toy company soberly tweeted remembrance of "those lost, & honor those still fighting for freedom." But the most off-putting way to remember the terrorist attacks on 9/11 was by Rep. Louie Gohmert, who thinks of Sep. 11 as the anniversary of Benghazi, or as he says it, "BENGHAZI!!"
BY SHERI HOLMES
Let's get to the burning national media issue of the week -- Ray Rice and spousal abuse.
If there's any institution arguably more noxious than the National Football League, it has to be Fox News. Where else can you see clueless blowhards laugh it up about wife-beating?
With House Republicans focused on legislation to boost job creation, the Senate is spending its time on an amendment to the U.S. Constitution that would repeal the First Amendment with respect to political speech. Democratic Whip Dick Durbin said before the debate even officially began: "I expect a fully partisan vote." So what exactly are all the Senate Democrats for and Republicans against?
Will Auguste Rodin's statue "The Thinker" start wearing aluminum foil on his head?