"I was standing on a corner in Winslow, Arizona, and such a fine sight to see: it's a girl, my lord, in a flatbed Ford, slowin' down to take a look at me."
You got to love Thanksgiving. You do. It's the law. And be honest; doesn't a little tryptophan poisoning amongst family and friends sound pretty comforting right about now? What with Ebola infested ISIS members slithering across the border carrying photos of Bill Cosby ogling Kim Kardashian's butt?
Exclusive Excerpt from: "Comical Sense: A Lone Humorist Takes on a World Gone Nutty!" by Tom Purcell
There is no shortage of pundits who could do a worthy job of waxing philosophical about the things we should or shouldn't be thankful for at Thanksgiving 2014.
It will not shock readers to hear that quite often legislation on Capitol Hill is not as advertised. When Congress wants to do something particularly objectionable, they tend give it a fine-sounding name. The PATRIOT Act is perhaps the best-known example. The legislation had been drafted well before 9/11 but was going nowhere. Then the 9/11 attacks gave it a new lease on life. Politicians exploited the surge in patriotism following the attack to reintroduce the bill and call it the PATRIOT Act. To oppose it at that time was, by design, to seem unpatriotic.
Nothing is less important in Washington these days than how Barack Obama's executive order on immigration will affect millions of unauthorized immigrants. Obama has turned a population roughly equal to Alabama into taxpayers who can live in America without fear of deportation, and this town yawns. All anyone really wants to talk about is whether the Republicans will completely freak out or manage to hold it together long enough for the government to function.
Liberal billionaires reap the benefits of their XL pipeline lobbying and what do they get?
Jack Clayton's 1974 rendition of The Great Gatsby is the quintessential American epic, as well as a sophisticated blockbuster.
Talk about being in the middle of Middle America.
Illegal immigrants are the perfect Republican foe. They're easily exploited as low-cost workers benefiting business and easily maligned for being "lawless" benefiting politicians. They're a foreign other with a tendency not to speak English so suspicion is ready-made. Plus, how are illegal immigrants going to stick up for themselves? They're not. They're an ideal rival!
I've done my fair share of stupid things over my life.
I set out to write an obituary about my mother, who died Nov. 15, and was taken aback by how much she never accomplished in her 94 years.
The autumn dark is lengthening, which means the English-speaking, Judeo-Christian Holiday Season is about to split open wider than a crocodile mouth at the bottom of a baby duckling water slide. It begins with Columbus Day. No mail and the banks are closed. Much is to be said for starting slow. Then the downward hurtle is set off by Halloween, when people toss about candy, free, incognito.
Most Americans, regardless of ideology, oppose "crony capitalism" or "cronyism." Cronyism is where politicians write laws aimed at helping their favored business beneficiaries. Despite public opposition to cronyism, politicians still seek to use the legislative process to help special interests.
I didn't watch the State of the Union address Tuesday night.
It's no secret that the American conservative movement is bereft of ideas.
Boy, does the world need a better sense of humor right about now.
Decades after being dismissed by George S. Kaufman as a genre that "closes on Saturday night," satire, like the measles and mumps, is making a comeback. And in many quarters, remains the most feared of the three conditions.
In the wake of the terrorist massacre in Paris, the new battle cry throughout the civilized world is "Je suis Charlie," meaning "I am Charlie." The phrase expresses solidarity for the four cartoonists and 13 others butchered by Islamic terrorists who attacked the satirical newspaper and a kosher market. But, actually, it's clear now that the slogan for this century should be another one: "We are screwed."
Hitler is in the news again, invoked by some ignorant people.
A decade ago, Rick Perry famously signed off an interview with the words, "Adios, mofo." Now, signing off as governor, he told the same reporter, "Adios, my friend." He might be on his way out, but he's leaving behind a cast of characters that promises years of entertainment. The price of oil might be tanking, but stupid will always be Texas' most abundant natural resource.
Since the creation of the Federal Reserve in 1913, the dollar has lost over 97 percent of its purchasing power, the US economy has been subjected to a series of painful Federal Reserve-created recessions and depressions, and government has grown to dangerous levels thanks to the Fed's policy of monetizing the debt. Yet the Federal Reserve still operates under a congressionally-created shroud of secrecy.
Everyone from Jon Stewart to Ted Cruz has mocked President Obama for not flying to France last weekend.
I received an unexpected postcard in the mail the other day from an old friend. It made my day.
The politics of the crude exports issue are confused by a lot of irresponsible reporting. Almost every story on the issue asserts that allowing exports would be politically dangerous because it would supposedly raise prices at the pump, but the claim is never credibly sourced. In fact, every single serious study has found precisely the opposite: allowing crude exports would lower prices at the pump.
Elizabeth Warren continues to bedazzle people precisely because she's not running for president. If she were to actually run for president, her power to bedazzle would diminish in a flash. To quote the sage Bob Dylan, "What looks large from a distance, close up ain't never that big."
After the tragic shooting at a provocative magazine in Paris last week, I pointed out that given the foreign policy positions of France we must consider blowback as a factor. Those who do not understand blowback made the ridiculous claim that I was excusing the attack or even blaming the victims. Not at all, as I abhor the initiation of force. The police blaming victims when they search for the motive of a criminal.
As the controversy builds over anything and everything relating to Barack Obama, many Republicans have come to believe that their party will prosper as a result.
Since 9/11, 34 people have been killed in America by Islamic jihadist terrorists.