Get this: The government is incentivizing people to not work.
No matter who you are or where you live or what you drive or whether you thought "The English Patient" or "Anchorman 2" the funnier movie, it is time to take a stand on plastic bread. Here's a hint: most of us are against it. Formaldehyde rinsed coffee beans? Not big fans. Flame retardants in our cupcakes? That's a big old negativo, Breaker One. And pink slime should be featured in horror films, not meat.
Exclusive Excerpt from: "Comical Sense: A Lone Humorist Takes on a World Gone Nutty!" by Tom Purcell
We thought the big controversies in the Sochi Winter Olympics would be toothpaste terrorism or government-sanctioned homophobia. Then the press tried to check into their hotels and discovered a comical array of foibles that will do nothing to boost the Russian tourism industry. But what shocks the traveling press corps-lost hotel reservations, uncovered manholes, unsafe tap water-is nothing new to those of us who have lived in Russia.
"Income Inequality" is the current marketing slogan for rallying voters to the Democratic Party. It just isn't "fair" that some people make millions of dollars a year "doing nothing" while millions of people work hard and struggle every day to put food on the table and afford HBO.
In one courtroom were poorly prepared attorneys, shackled defendants and assembly-line justice. In another, things were all spit and polish: "yes, sir" and "thank you, ma'am."
Note: A version of this column was originally published shortly after 9/11. Since then, from time to time, it has seemed appropriate to submit it again as a way of expressing the frustration of a populace whose leaders simply will not listen to their will. I offer it again in that spirit.
In the darkest recesses of our minds we have always known that monsters exist. It is only when we are involuntarily thrust into an unfolding human tragedy that shocks our senses and devastates our hearts that we truly acknowledge their presence.
At the risk of being branded a Valentine Grinch, I must take issue with opinions expressed recently in the Winnipeg Sun.
Canadian-born, teen heart throb Justin Bieber's criminal misbehavior may indirectly hurt Congress' push for comprehensive immigration reform. All systems for the White House's coveted blanket amnesty are "go." President Obama just touted his version of reform during his Tuesday State of the Union address. House Majority leader John Boehner released what he calls his "immigration principles." Given those two major immigration developments, now could be a bad time for a foreign-born visa holder to be in the headlines because of his embarrassing illegal antics. Because of Bieber's high visibility, journalists reporting on his story-seemingly everyone in the ...
When the Hindenburg flew over Lakehurst Naval Air Station in New Jersey on May 6, 1937, as it burst into flames, causing 35 fatalities, WLS radio's Herbert Morrison's eyewitness account became one that would be remembered for the ages: "Oh, the humanity!"
Get this: Americans are getting sick of McMansions.
President Obama laid out his personal standard for approving the presidential permit for the Keystone XL pipeline in his global warming speech at Georgetown University on June 25, 2013. If the project increases global warming, he'll veto it. Based on that standard, he should now approve the project - immediately.
Sometimes rhetorical questions demand answers. When Texas state Sen. Leticia Van de Putte asked, "At what point must a female senator raise her hand or her voice to be recognized over her male colleagues?" the deafening roar from the gallery carried Wendy Davis' filibuster over the midnight finish line last summer. But Van de Putte only got an answer last week. It turns out that it doesn't matter if a woman is even dead or raped. Texas Republicans don't recognize women at all.
February 12 marks the 205th anniversary of the birth of our sixteenth president. Yes, I could write a lot of dry, pompous stuff about the life and legacy of Abraham Lincoln; but whereas Lincoln had only 18 months of formal education, I was exposed to the warped perspective of history teacher Jerry Holt at Marshall County High School (Lewisburg, Tennessee) for THREE YEARS, so what you're going to get is The Lincoln You Never Knew.
Get this: The U.S. Supreme Court is about to decide whether false accusations and mudslinging during political campaigns are illegal.
Every so often, someone in politics says something so preposterously hilarious that we're at pains to prevent our coffee from exiting our noses.
Quite simply, from pharmaceuticals to motion pictures to software, India is stealing our stuff. India ranks dead last among major economies in protection of intellectual property rights, according to a comprehensive analysis by the U.S. Chamber of Commerce. And despite lots of talk and visits from Secretary of State John Kerry and Vice President Joe Biden last year, India's respect for property rights has only continued to deteriorate. It's time for the administration to get tough and designate India as a Priority Foreign Country in its 2014 Special 301 Report, making clear that India will suffer consequences ...
Today I am announcing a new venture to grow aspara-berries. These tasty and nutritious hybrid plants combine the best features of asparagus and strawberries to create a mouthwatering treat.
You'd think Americans have enough stuff to worry about. Severe drought desiccating a third of the country. A political system whose major talent is demonstrating stasis in action. The rich using the poor as fleshy paving stones for the road to mansions on the hill. Ben Affleck as Batman.
Have you heard we live in an oligarchy? Perhaps you've been told America is a plutocracy? Is that because of widespread demagogy?
Be careful, Pennsylvania people.
This week, Hank Aaron broke the hearts of millions of Republicans and conservatives who supported him and cheered him on in 1974 while racists threatened his life.
Are hard-line Republican conservatives about to implement their own version of political entitlement reform? Are we now witnessing the beginning of the fall of the House of Bush?
The Blood Moon on Monday night might have brought on the apocalypse, because a rash of stupidity in politics seems to have infected this great land of ours. When you have one major political party winning the argument against evolution, brainless is the new black. But if Republicans define dumb down any more, soon they'll have to apply for drilling rights.
Everett Dirksen and his fellow moderate Republicans (a now virtually extinct species) transcended partisanship in 1964 and supplied the key votes to pass the historic Civil Rights Act. Now flash forward 50 years. Can you imagine how today's Republicans would respond if a major civil rights bill was on the table?
OCEAN CITY, N.J - Everyone loves a parade, or so they say, and by Labor Day practically every town and village in America will have one. They could all learn something from the way folks here conduct a mid-April oddity called the Doo Dah Parade.
"I can't believe it. The wife and I owe the IRS again!"
In a move as surprising as limos at a state funeral the GOP has misplaced their ticket for the clue train. Yes, again. Just when you think they get it, party leaders move heaven and earth and that place due south to prove that not only do they not get it, they have never gotten it and aren't really comfortable around people who do get it. One suspects, secretly, they don't want it.
It was 2007 and we were all gathered around the kitchen table. It was my husband; his parents, Frank and Rachel (not their real names); and me spending a Sunday afternoon catching up. Everyone, it seemed at that time, had just bought a house. Their modest three-bedroom tract home, which they were a year from paying off, was now worth half-a-million dollars.