No, this is not The Onion. No, this is not a rip-off of The Onion. This is not satire. This is the plea from Iraq's Prime Minister, Minister of the Interior, Minister of Defense and the Minister of National Security Affairs. All of whom happen to be the same person: Nouri al-Maliki.
President Obama "didn't know" his IRS was targeting conservative groups, successfully impeding their ability to promote policies he opposes.
Dear Mr. President,
News from ABC and FOX about potential hair restoration breakthroughs makes me think back to a traumatic discovery in my first year of marriage.
HOLLYWOOD - God bless America, and how's everybody?
"The wife and I came up with so many Halloween costume ideas this year to satirize Washington politicians, but we aren't sure which to choose."
It seems every major scandal, abuse of power, and spectacular failure in President Barack Obama's administration happens, we're told, without the president's knowledge.
Women of Texas, Republican Attorney General Greg Abbott is here to tell you how good you have it. In fact, he recently said, "I'm proud to say there is nobody in the state of Texas who has done more to fight to help women than I have in the past decade." You'll have to excuse the man. He's running for governor, and it's becoming clear that his right hand doesn't know what the far-right hand is doing.
The Music Man showed up here the other day, hoping to separate school kids from their money.
One thing you can say about Republicans. They are focused. Like lasers. Or a puppy with a chew toy. Obamacare? No, sir. They don't like it. They don't like it so much, they have become interested in the Internet. They no longer refer to it as the interweb, riddled with tubes and tunnels and chutes and ladders.
Not every bad thing that happens to us is bad, long term. I've learned it well; some of life's biggest blessings arrive unexpectedly, wrapped in the most unsightly dressings. It's as if the alchemy happens in the waiting. And so it may be for the GOP, as they now get to witness certain Democrats, who supported Obamacare, paying a hefty price for their misdeeds. (And who says there isn't a God?)
While we watch the S.S. Obamacare sink beneath the waves, and while we watch the White House explain why its signature legislative "achievement" is not the titanic disaster we all knew it would be, I have some advice for my fellow Republicans.
Ah, time passes faster than a flying saucer. So we blink and find that October 30 marks the 75th anniversary of one of the most embarrassing incidents in American history.
Is America's center rising again? It certainly seems that way.
The French daily Le Monde alleges that the US National Security Agency has spied on French diplomats in Washington and at the UN. I contacted my French informant, Pierre Le Paint, to learn more about the incident.
Ah, college is back in session - which means, says The Washington Post, that "helicopter parents" are in full flight.
Happy anniversary, Daisy girl! What would our politics be like today if she hadn't burst upon the scene 50 years ago - a freckled tyke blown up in a nuclear blast, the star of America's first gut-punch TV ad?
September is a grand month for traditions. Fresh pencils and tablets for the upcoming school year. The approach of fall as evidenced by the turning of the leaves. International Talk Like a Pirate Day on the 19th. The official start to the NFL season with the filing of the first domestic abuse charge.
Forty years ago many Americans celebrated the demise of the imperial presidency with the resignation of Richard Nixon. Today, it is clear they celebrated too soon. Nixon's view of presidential powers, summed up in his infamous statement that, "when the president does it that means it is not illegal," is embraced by the majority of the political class. In fact, the last two presidents have abused their power in ways that would have made Nixon blush.
Could it be that the "elephant in the room" is literally an elephant in the room?
Breitbart News is reporting federal border agents have been warned by their superiors of a serious threat by ISIS to cross into the United States. Five major banks recently suffered the theft of terabytes of customers' data by hackers. Every day, 2,000 Americans such as yourself have their identities hijacked by thieves stealing money from credit cards, medical cards and social security accounts.
Time's up, Mr. President.
The news made many Americans do a double-take. Wait a minute: this news story says a 9-year-old girl accidentally killed her gun instructor while he was teaching her to use...an Uzi? An UZI?! One of those Israeli-designed compact sub automatic machine guns? That gun that can fire 600 rounds per minute? It just had to be a bad joke.