Dear American citizens:
No, this is not The Onion. No, this is not a rip-off of The Onion. This is not satire. This is the plea from Iraq's Prime Minister, Minister of the Interior, Minister of Defense and the Minister of National Security Affairs. All of whom happen to be the same person: Nouri al-Maliki.
President Obama "didn't know" his IRS was targeting conservative groups, successfully impeding their ability to promote policies he opposes.
Dear Mr. President,
News from ABC and FOX about potential hair restoration breakthroughs makes me think back to a traumatic discovery in my first year of marriage.
HOLLYWOOD - God bless America, and how's everybody?
"The wife and I came up with so many Halloween costume ideas this year to satirize Washington politicians, but we aren't sure which to choose."
It seems every major scandal, abuse of power, and spectacular failure in President Barack Obama's administration happens, we're told, without the president's knowledge.
Women of Texas, Republican Attorney General Greg Abbott is here to tell you how good you have it. In fact, he recently said, "I'm proud to say there is nobody in the state of Texas who has done more to fight to help women than I have in the past decade." You'll have to excuse the man. He's running for governor, and it's becoming clear that his right hand doesn't know what the far-right hand is doing.
The Music Man showed up here the other day, hoping to separate school kids from their money.
One thing you can say about Republicans. They are focused. Like lasers. Or a puppy with a chew toy. Obamacare? No, sir. They don't like it. They don't like it so much, they have become interested in the Internet. They no longer refer to it as the interweb, riddled with tubes and tunnels and chutes and ladders.
Not every bad thing that happens to us is bad, long term. I've learned it well; some of life's biggest blessings arrive unexpectedly, wrapped in the most unsightly dressings. It's as if the alchemy happens in the waiting. And so it may be for the GOP, as they now get to witness certain Democrats, who supported Obamacare, paying a hefty price for their misdeeds. (And who says there isn't a God?)
While we watch the S.S. Obamacare sink beneath the waves, and while we watch the White House explain why its signature legislative "achievement" is not the titanic disaster we all knew it would be, I have some advice for my fellow Republicans.
Ah, time passes faster than a flying saucer. So we blink and find that October 30 marks the 75th anniversary of one of the most embarrassing incidents in American history.
Is America's center rising again? It certainly seems that way.
It's been years since I used AOL for any kind of meaningful email but I can't bring myself to close the account. I keep thinking that somewhere in my cyber past there's an old friend about to reach out - and all he has is my AOL address.
To call the grotesque drubbing suffered by the Democratic Party in the midterms monumental, is like referring to the surface of the sun as warm. The scene was so grisly, acutely sensitive Democrats (most of them) were forced to avert their eyes or risk anaphylactic shock.
Republicans may have won the Senate and kept the House, but Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell is no inspiration, allowing President Obama to keep all of the leverage of shutting down government spending while the President wags the threatening finger of executive orders in McConnell's face.
An excerpt from Tom Purcell's new book, "Comical Sense: A Lone Humorist Takes on a World Gone Nutty!"
Carroll Hosbrook, a farm boy from Ohio, found himself in a small French village on Nov. 11, 1918. Bells in a bombed-out church were still intact, ringing out the good news of the Armistice having been signed-on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month. Carroll was writing home on this historic day, a series of letters that chronicled his service-from boot camp to battlefield. My Uncle Carroll had a wry sense of humor, an eye for girls, and a strong sense of duty to family and country.