"Good morning, class," says the sixth-grade teacher. "Today, we have a special guest from the U.S. Bureau of Engraving. Mr. Bob Johnson is going to tell us how money is made. Feel free to ask questions."
The great American conservative thinker Russell Kirk once observed that some disasters are so catastrophic they require a re-examination of first principles. On Election Day, the Republican Party suffered such an existential shock.
With Hamas Rockets falling on Israel, massive layoffs decimating America's family's finances, and Barack Obama demanding massive tax increases or he will drive us over the fiscal cliff, we cannot help but day- dream about four years from now. We dream of days when Barack Obama will finally be retired, and his ignorance of economics will no longer plague our homeland.
The fall of retired Army General David Petraeus is a story as old as the Garden of Eden. Sin has consequences. It does not undo a lifetime of service, nor does it negate every good deed ever performed, but it leaves a mark, a scar, like nails driven into a fine table top. The nails can be removed, just as transgressions can be forgiven, but the scars will remain.
Democrats have been blaming George W. Bush for the last four years.
According to the New York Daily News, the government-initiated website "We The People" has been bombarded by petitions since the election.
Everyone is preoccupied with the events surrounding the juicy sex scandal involving now-former CIA Director David Petraeus to the point they may not have noticed a pattern -- a shake-down -- that is taking place in our military top brass, much like the one currently happening in Russia under President Vladimir Putin.
The 2012 elections surprised both sides and hit a reset button on the Obama administration -- and American politics. Here are 10 conclusions:
HOLLYWOOD - God bless America, and how's everybody?
HOLLYWOOD--God bless America, and how's everybody?
Wait until next year -- 2016, that is.
BEVERLY HILLS - God bless America, and how's everybody?
Just because the election is over doesn't mean the arguments are over. Arguments between conservative and liberal, rural and urban, east and west, rich and poor, citizen and immigrant, man and woman, young and old.
The service to our nation our veterans provided can never be fully repaid. But, Americans like me who are indebted to their service will never cease trying to show the respect and gratitude of a thankful nation.
Hide your wallets and shield the children, because they're voting down in Texas. Texas Republicans will be testing the strength of the Tea Party as they pick their first post-Rick Perry slate of statewide candidates since the 1980s. But Texas Democrats might end up missing Perry, as there is a decent shot that Republicans will nominate not their best-qualified, most-electable candidates but an entire clown car full of crazypants.
Hollywood and Washington: Both entertaining, often boring and far too often irresponsible.
For all those who have spent the last couple of months shoveling out a car, you should know we're at the tail end of awards season. And best be advised to hunker in a bunker wearing a Kevlar overcoat, because gold plated statues are being tossed about like air kisses at a gown fitting. Like clouds of bathroom hair spray during Oscar nominee luncheons. Like jaded eyes at a press screening of "Transformers 4."
Is Bill Clinton still president?
Is the United States inevitably on the path to Hillaryland?
According to the Los Angeles Times, California state Senator Bill Monning on February 13 introduced a controversial bill that could make California the first state in the nation to require prominent health warnings (about obesity, diabetes and tooth decay) on sugary drinks.
Let's keep it together, people.
The passing of Sid Caesar, a comedic genius if ever such a term could be used without fear of hyperbole, reminds us that television once had what its fans considered a Golden Age.
Exclusive Excerpt from: "Comical Sense: A Lone Humorist Takes on a World Gone Nutty!" by Tom Purcell