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A Woman’s View

The sales pitch

POSTED April 10, 2018 11:41 a.m.

I recently attended a Farm and Ranch Expo. It was a big show.
There were many booths, giveaways, food stands, and nice people.
As I meandered down the aisle, suddenly an arm appeared out of nowhere holding a packet of something in front of me. “Will you try our sample of cream?”
“No thank you.”
“It’s a free gift. He continued waving the little packet at me (Fishing Class1-A: Keep the client engaged)
This arm in action belonged to a male. This guy was a very manicured, good looking, young man.
No doubt he was thinking, “Bite, bite the hook”.
I stopped. I bit. (Why?) We Americans are polite folk, and don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. These “fishermen” seem to know that.
We all know how it works, don’t we? It’s a numbers game with these guys. Just keep offering the product; like dangling a lure while fishing. It’s the same game.
I stood there immobilized, and suddenly I felt naked and exposed. (What’s that about?!) I became that deer in headlights. I begin to plan my escape.
He looked at me closely with scrutiny; studied me. (Oh, help.)
He leaned into my personal space. “Ma’am, if I offered you a product that could diminish those lines on your face and neck, and give you a much younger look, would you...”
I thought. “Here we go again.” I used to be intimidated way back when, but now I was simply amused. After all, he could be my grandson.
I smiled. “You know what? I don’t care. I really don’t care if I have wrinkles.”
He was undaunted. He had heard this before, obviously.
He replied, “Oh I think you care. I notice that you are concerned with your appearance. You have a beautiful necklace on, your hair is colored, and you are dressed nicely. I believe you do care. But let me ask you...why do all of that and forget your face?”
I smiled and stared him down. “Ohhhh. YOU are good at this.”
He stared me back. “No, I am not good. I am VERY good.”
We were having a “stare-off.”
“Look,” I kindly replied, “I have just been through this same dialog with a young lady who gave me the same sales speech. (I was careful not to say “pitch”) She held up the mirror to my neck, to my face, etc. and showed me the lines I could erase. She pointed out each one.”
He said, “Where did you see this demonstration?”
He hoped to trap me, but no! He could not!
I couldn’t remember at first. But just then, thank God, it came to me.
“I attended the Home and Garden Show two weeks ago in Denver. I found out that the cost of the 2 year supply is about $700. No way. My husband Fred would kill me!”
“I could give you a discount if you will try this”, he said. (He was backpedaling)
“No, I am happy just the way I am. I wouldn’t want to look any younger because my friends, Tilda, Greta, Louise, and Betty would not be comfortable with me any more.” He didn’t react or blink an eye.
I’m one of those who can’t turn tail and just walk away from anyone. I have done it, but it’s difficult. Fred has often stood right next to me, placed his hand on the small of my back, and pushed me onward.
You see, I have made my share of foolish purchases, and I have also been conned, intimidated, cheated, swindled, and generally fried in the pan. Those uncomfortable thoughts flash back to me and I feel that embarrassed feeling from when it happened to me before.
So, I walked away. I smiled and said “Good-bye. Have a good day.”
I did it! I did it, wrinkles and all.
The product may work, and this guy may know his stuff. But this fish didn’t bite, at least not this time.

Judi Tabler lives in Pawnee County and is a guest columnist for the Great Bend Tribune. She can be reached at bluegrasses@gmail.com. Visit her website juditabler.com.

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