The suicide of a family member leaves a lasting legacy that lingers on for remaining family members. But Sharon Engle, whose grandson Robert Shewbart committed suicide, has a message of hope.
She has used the family’s tragedy to make a difference in the lives of others by sharing his story. Also, Shewbart was an organ donor and his generous donations have changed the lives of many.
“He’s living on-that was his decision,” said Engle. “When I hear from organ recipients, it’s good for our family. It helps us cope. He was a giving person.”
Engle said that Robert will never be forgotten. On the two birthdays since his May 2012 death, the family has held a balloon lift.
“We never will forget him,” said Engle.
Engle, who raised Shewbart with her husband Bob, still doesn’t know the entire story concerning his decision to commit suicide in May 2012, but looking back can see some red flags.
“He was a big strong kid with some health issues,” said Engle. Due to sports injuries, he had to have two surgeries in addition to dealing with asthma. He had been awarded a football scholarship that he was not going to be able to use.
 In addition, Sharon’s husband Bob, who Shewbart was very close to, had died three months prior.
“It hit him real hard,” said Engle. He also mentioned one time that he was depressed, but apparently had talked more to friends than to his grandparents.
“(Shewbert’s) church service was packed,” she said. “All of his friends just asked why. But you can’t beat yourself up. You have to go on.”
The family set up a scholarship at Park School, where Robert went to school. They gave out the first scholarship last year.
In addition, Engle has joined the area Suicide Prevention Task Force to spread awareness. “That’s very rewarding,” said Engle. “We let people know that there is help.
“Being involved in Suicide Prevention, I’ve learned so much,” she said. Since Robert’s death, friends who have also been touched by suicide have shared their stories and been supportive.
Knowing that one can only do so much for others, she added, “If it does happen, don’t forget them. Robert always had a smile. Everybody loved him. But you just have to go on. I know he is at peace.
“I may not have agreed with his decision, but I just know he is with his grandpa,” said Sharon, who having lost her husband had to deal with the additional blow of losing her grandson within a three month time period.
“Suicide is like a ripple effect,” Engle said. “I got cards from all around. I don’t think Robert realized the impact he had on people.”
Because of a strong network of church, family and friends, and her own personal strength, Engle has been able to move on. “You can’t dwell,” she said. But, she has a message for others.
“Be aware. Listen. Ask for help,” Engle said. “It’s a tough world out there for kids. It’s a different world.”
Suicide in Barton County
Barton County lost eight people to suicide in 2012. That number is down from last year from 2011 when the county lost 11.
According to the Kansas Department of Health and Environment for 2012, 505 people in the state died from suicide, which is up from 384 suicide deaths in 2011. Eighty-two percent of suicide victims are male. In 2012, the two age groups with the largest number of suicides were ages 45-54 (110 deaths) and ages 25-34 (87 deaths).
Barton County has taken an active step in suicide prevention with the addition of the Suicide Prevention Task Force as a part of the Central Kansas Partnership. The task force has had a speaker come and held a fundraiser and remembrance ceremony last September.
The remembrance ceremony went particularly well. “People there were grateful we had it,” said Waite. The task force is planning another walk/run/bicycle and remembrance ceremony for September 2014.
“The coalition is raising awareness of suicide prevention and identifying the need for education in the community,” said Janel Rose, Suicide Prevention Task Force.
Anyone interested in participating in the prevention task force can call the Barton County Health Department 793-1902.