With all due respect to Frank Sinatra, Ol’ Blue Eyes didn’t have it quite right when he sang, “I did it my way.”

The line is indicative, though, of a culture that glorifies the concept of climbing ladders of success and vilifies the idea of submission as a sign of weakness. Submitting ourselves to the authority of another is discouraged as an affront to our independence and self-sufficiency, and leadership is seen as domination.

So when Scripture elevates the idea of submission as an admirable, indeed a distinctly Christ-like trait, we tend to dismiss the passages that discuss it as antiquated and not applicable to an “enlightened” society.

However, the idea of Biblical submission is anything but antiquated, and when properly lived out should impact every relationship we find ourselves in, and can distinctly improve the quality of those relationships.

So what is submission in the Biblical context, anyway, and why is it necessary?

Paul gives us an excellent picture of this in Philippians 2 when he tells us, “do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but the interest of others.” (Phil 2:3-4, italics mine)

He goes on to paint a picture of what this looks like practically, describing Jesus’s submission to the Father’s authority, obediently accepting in love the punishment of the cross for the sake of our salvation.

Submission, then, is the example of Christ, not power and domination, but instead a willful, loving sacrifice of our own desires so that others can be lifted up, provided for and encourages. It is loving service to others in which our will becomes secondary to living the sacrificial example of Christ.

The problem is, humanly speaking, too often we apply a double standard to this in our relationships. We accept the passages that require others to submit to us, but quickly dismiss the ones that ask us to submit to others.

However, Paul is quick to tell us we do not submit for our own sakes. Instead, he said, we are “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

In other words, we submit to others in love, because of our gratitude for Christ’s sacrifice for us.

But what does this look like in our daily lives?

“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” (Colossians 3:12-14, ESV)

As husbands and wives, we submit to one another in love because of our desire to see our spouse lifted up and beautified, just as Christ did for the church. As parents, we sacrifice our wills to ensure our children are cared for provided for, and instructed as the gifts they are to us from the Lord. 

As employees, we submit to the our employers, because we, “work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” (Col. 3:23-24, ESV)

And in the societal context, Paul instructs, “Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God.” (Romans 13:1, ESV)

If, however, we find ourselves in a position of authority over another, we are still under submission to Christ. We find in John 13 a picture of what that Christ-like leadership ought to look like.

“If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you. Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him.” (John 13:14-16, ESV)

Submission, then is not a sign of weakness or domination. Indeed, it is in loving submission to Christ and others that we find the greatest strength.

Daniel Kiewel is a reporter for the Great Bend (Kan.) Tribune. He can be reached at dkiewel@gbtribune.com.