As my grandmother would say, I have a tendency to borrow troubles from tomorrow. Its taxing to be stressed about things that are out of my control. Years ago, I heard a piece of advice thats been helpful when I find myself agonizing over a decision: Will my choice really matter in 10 minutes? 10 days? 10 years? If you really answer honestly, I promise instant perspective (and less worrying).
Using energy to fuss and fidget about things in these 7 categories is exhausting. Cut out the things that wont matter down the road.
The invitation (not) in your mailbox
Not getting invited to something you should be invited to is hurtful. I dont want to downplay that. Youve been friends for years, you are going to be related through marriage, and you even promised to be each others godparents, but you didnt get an invite to the reception. That stings, but will it really matter in 10 years? If you let it become grudge that festers in your heart, it will (see below). But if you can move past your hurt and understand why you didnt get the invitation, you dont have to lose out on that friendship.
Grudges (obviously)
I hope this point doesnt come as a shocker. Holding grudges is so middle school. What good does it do, holding such strong feelings against a person? You might not want them in your life (by all means, dont allow toxic people), but it doesnt mean you have to waste so much energy hating them. The grudge against your former boyfriend isnt going to matter in 10 years, so why are you holding onto it now?
Your kids friends mom
The opinion of others doesnt really matter. Truly. What the parent of the little girl your child plays with thinks about your house is not relevant now, later, or 1,000 years into the future. Be yourself, dont be fake, and find those in life who appreciate you. Take advice with a grain of salt, and dont let the thoughts of others override what you feel in your gut. What really matters later on is if you are happy with your choice, not that you changed to please someone else.
Fear factor
It sounds clich, but living life with no regrets is a powerful statement. Waiting for the perfect moment, the ideal crowd, and promising yourself youll try it next year is only giving you more worries. You are giving yourself the power to hold yourself back. Dont worry you might look silly, dont worry itll mess everything up, dont worry you might not like it. In 10 years, youll regret you never took the chance, despite your fears.
#selfies
Todays social media world makes it hard to define self-confidence. Is your personal identity based on how you feel about yourself? Or is it caught up with how many likes you got on that last post? Honestly, in 10 years (if Instagram even exists in 10 years) the number of likes you got on a post is not going to keep you up at night. Yes, it makes you feel popular to have dozens of comments and hundreds of likes, but there are more substantial things to be concerned about.
Mary, Mary, quite contrary
Where has complaining gotten you in life? Of course, noticing a problem and doing something about it is entirely different, but just plain old complaining? The decision to complain isnt doing you any favors in 10 minutes or 10 months, let alone 10 years.
Price tags
Right now, it doesnt seem worth it to splurge a little bit on a purchase. A slightly older car? A smaller bigger house? A dress you like, but dont love? These are financial shortcuts we take to save some money right now. But in 10 years, you will be grateful you have fewer car problems, theres room for twins in the guest bedroom and looking back at your wedding photos doesnt remind you of how you cut corners. Dont get anything you cant afford, but buying something a bit nicer isnt going to matter in 10 years.
There are plenty of things that are going to affect you in 10 years. Worrying about these 7 things dont need to a part of what you fret about.
Using energy to fuss and fidget about things in these 7 categories is exhausting. Cut out the things that wont matter down the road.
The invitation (not) in your mailbox
Not getting invited to something you should be invited to is hurtful. I dont want to downplay that. Youve been friends for years, you are going to be related through marriage, and you even promised to be each others godparents, but you didnt get an invite to the reception. That stings, but will it really matter in 10 years? If you let it become grudge that festers in your heart, it will (see below). But if you can move past your hurt and understand why you didnt get the invitation, you dont have to lose out on that friendship.
Grudges (obviously)
I hope this point doesnt come as a shocker. Holding grudges is so middle school. What good does it do, holding such strong feelings against a person? You might not want them in your life (by all means, dont allow toxic people), but it doesnt mean you have to waste so much energy hating them. The grudge against your former boyfriend isnt going to matter in 10 years, so why are you holding onto it now?
Your kids friends mom
The opinion of others doesnt really matter. Truly. What the parent of the little girl your child plays with thinks about your house is not relevant now, later, or 1,000 years into the future. Be yourself, dont be fake, and find those in life who appreciate you. Take advice with a grain of salt, and dont let the thoughts of others override what you feel in your gut. What really matters later on is if you are happy with your choice, not that you changed to please someone else.
Fear factor
It sounds clich, but living life with no regrets is a powerful statement. Waiting for the perfect moment, the ideal crowd, and promising yourself youll try it next year is only giving you more worries. You are giving yourself the power to hold yourself back. Dont worry you might look silly, dont worry itll mess everything up, dont worry you might not like it. In 10 years, youll regret you never took the chance, despite your fears.
#selfies
Todays social media world makes it hard to define self-confidence. Is your personal identity based on how you feel about yourself? Or is it caught up with how many likes you got on that last post? Honestly, in 10 years (if Instagram even exists in 10 years) the number of likes you got on a post is not going to keep you up at night. Yes, it makes you feel popular to have dozens of comments and hundreds of likes, but there are more substantial things to be concerned about.
Mary, Mary, quite contrary
Where has complaining gotten you in life? Of course, noticing a problem and doing something about it is entirely different, but just plain old complaining? The decision to complain isnt doing you any favors in 10 minutes or 10 months, let alone 10 years.
Price tags
Right now, it doesnt seem worth it to splurge a little bit on a purchase. A slightly older car? A smaller bigger house? A dress you like, but dont love? These are financial shortcuts we take to save some money right now. But in 10 years, you will be grateful you have fewer car problems, theres room for twins in the guest bedroom and looking back at your wedding photos doesnt remind you of how you cut corners. Dont get anything you cant afford, but buying something a bit nicer isnt going to matter in 10 years.
There are plenty of things that are going to affect you in 10 years. Worrying about these 7 things dont need to a part of what you fret about.
