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Dear Editor,
I am asking the public to support me as I try to bring new jobs to Kansas.
I am going to apply to the Department of Energy for a $300 million grant to set up a company to sell solar panels in an entirely new market.
This market is the application of solar technology on submarines.
No one has ever done this before, so I am sure that the Obama administration will be eager to support this.
I will spend $50 million on setting up a fancy building with huge signs on it that spells out SUBMARINE SOLAR.
Then I will spend $50 million hiring about 500 people. They will have two jobs.
The first one is to look busy and professional when the visitng dignitaries from Washington are visiting. The second is to take the solar panels out of the boxes in which they were shipped from China, and put them in new boxes with bright American flags on them. T
hat would infer that they are American made.
I would spend about $50 million on a staff of accountants who are adept at hiding the true costs of operations and how to divert the money to Swiss bank accounts.
Using Congress’s accounting methods, I figure I can transfer over $400 million to my accounts.
They would also need to generate huge losses for when we declare bankruptcy.
I would promise not to declare bankruptcy until after the November 2012 elections.
The timing is important, because if Obama loses the election, everyone will be so busy celebrating that no one will notice that I took the money and ran.
If Obama does win, then I will be near the front of the line to feed at the trough of “free” stimulus money.
You say this sound ridiculous?
It has been pulled dozens of times during the past three years by friends of the Obama White House.
Why shouldn’t it work for a conservative Republican living in Kansas?
Jim Vance,