There’s an old song that was running through my head lately. The younger crowd won’t know it. The song is “I Enjoy Being a Girl” and it was written by Rogers and Hammerstein who wrote scads of beautiful music during their careers.

The lyrics go something like this; 

I flip when a fellow sends me flowers,

I drool over dresses made of lace,

I talk on the telephone for hours

With a pound and a half of cream upon my face!

When men say I’m cute and funny

And my teeth aren’t teeth, but pearl,

I just lap it up like honey

I enjoy being a girl!

I’m strictly a female, female

And my future I hope will be

In the home of a brave and free male

Who’ll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.

Now, I realize that there are those who are not comfortable in their own skin, and that for various reasons, they are not happy with their sex. However, the removal of nouns and pronouns that identify one sex or the other seems a bit over the top. But that is exactly what is happening. The new Transgender policies specify the removal of any legal recognition of sexual identity words. Under the Equality Act, the use of pronouns which identify sex as male or female are no longer to be used. Since the Equality Act defends trans-gender rights, it will codify into federal law transgender bathrooms, the elimination of “women-only” sports, forcing pronoun use, and other special transgender privileges. All of a sudden, I cannot use nouns and pronouns like his, hers, mother, father, sister, brother. And I will have to change the words to the song to something like this:

I flip when a “being” sends me flowers,

I drool over dresses made of lace,

I talk on the telephone for hours

With a pound and a half of cream upon my face!

When “persons” say I’m cute and funny

And my teeth aren’t teeth, but pearl,

I just lap it up like honey

I enjoy being a “person”!

I’m strictly a “person, person”

And my future I hope will be

In the home of a brave and free “person”

Who’ll enjoy being a “person” having a “person” like... me.

Doesn’t that just warm your heart though?        

Judi Tabler lives in Pawnee County and is a guest columnist for the Great Bend Tribune. She can be reached at juditabler@gmail.com