It’s a joyous time of the year – Christmas season and all. A time when people just walk around and sing Christmas carols to themselves. At least I do. Sing them, hum them, whatever the moments brings.
I sometimes even just sit around the house and sing and hum Christmas tunes – all year ‘round actually. The problem with this is no one wants to really hear me. Not because they don’t have the Christmas spirit, but, you see, I really don’t sing that well.
My mother even tells me I’m, well, not a good singer. And when your mother tells you something like that, you must be pretty bad.
Fortunately, there are other ways to hear Christmas carols being sung than waiting for me to pass by. Grade school vocal concerts are in full swing around the town. The high school vocal Christmas concert is set for Monday at 7:30 pm. The high school orchestra and band concert is the following Monday, Dec. 18, at 6 p.m.
While I didn’t sing well, I did play a pretty mean baritone in the high school band.
Steve Webster calls her Magic Johnson. He isn’t too far from accurate when describing Emily Ryan of Central Plains. He has been doing this since the first game he saw her play as a freshman last year.
Ryan, or Magic, is fresh off a 51-point game for the Oilers. Yes, that’s right, 51 points. Oh, and for good measure the 5-9 sophomore had nine assists and nine steals. That is where the Magic part comes into play. That was after a ho-hum 44-point game to open the season on 17-of-21 shooting from the field along with seven assists.
In case you’re keeping score, Central Plains had won three straight state titles before Ryan entered high school last year. Magic and crew made it four straight. Don’t bet against seven straight before she is done.
When you mention basketball and Claflin right now, most people say, ‘Oh, you mean Jackie Stiles’ hometown’. We are not too far from people saying, ‘Oh, you mean Emily Ryan’s hometown.’
It wasn’t the conclusion that former Barton volleyball coach Ray Bechard wanted for his KU team this season. The Jayhawks saw their season come to an end with a loss in the opening round of the NCAA tournament to that evil team – Missouri.
The Jayhawks finish their season with a 22-8 overall mark and a first round exit in the tournament. Last season Kansas went 27-3, losing in the second round after a Final Four appearance in 2015.
It was the sixth straight 20-win season for Bechard, the winningest coach in the history of both Kansas and Barton volleyball.
I often walk around in my own world. I tell jokes people don’t laugh it. People talk to me (my wife) and I don’t always hear them.
I now know why.
I live two minutes ahead of the rest of the world. That’s right. The atomic clock on my cell phone is two minutes ahead of everyone else. Crystal’s phone, Katelyn’s phone, the television clock. All of them are the same time. Exactly. Change minutes identically.
My phone – two minutes ahead. So I must live two minutes into the future. I have no other explanation. Our phones are identical. Bought at the same time.
Since I can’t figure out why, I decided I must have a super power.
Now, I’ve noticed before that sometimes when watching a ball game on television and talking on the phone to someone watching the same game, the action doesn’t quite match up. It’s usually only a few seconds apart, though.
But that must have been before my full super powers kicked in that put me a two minutes ahead of everyone else.
I wonder if I will need to get a cape and maybe some tights. Do you have to fill out some kind of permit for super powers?
Will I need a super hero name and everything?
Now if I just need to learn to harness this super power. If I figure out how to use it right, I could avoid a lot of things by living two minutes ahead.
I would be able to know ahead of time when Crystal is going to ask a question I don’t want to answer. I would already know who is knocking at the door and whether to pretend like I am not home. I would know when Katelyn wants money and conveniently be gone already.
If I would have only had this power when playing competitive sports. Or even better when I coach junior high football. Now that would have been pretty cool.
Perhaps it is the beginning stages of the movie Groundhog Day – when Bill Murray kept living the same day over and over.
That might be fun – for a while. Eventually you would have the day down pretty good. It would be even better if you could pick that day – after you lived it once. It would be pretty cool to find a good day and kept living it over and over.
Anyway, I will now try and figure out just how to use my new super power properly.
By the way, I finished reading this column two minutes ago.
Mike Marzolf is a guest columnist for the Great Bend Tribune and his views don’t necessarily reflect those of the paper. He can be reached at MarzolfM@bartonccc.edu.