Several weeks ago, I wrote about paring down, Christmas items in particular. I did get rid of some things, but not all, and  that is why I need to confess.

If you care to recall, I had decided that the big tree, in several parts, stuffed in bags, would not be showing its branches this year. In fact, I decided to give it away. I planned to set up the little 2 1/2 foot tree on a table in our main living area. However, my adult son, who is visiting for a few days, and his father “Fred,” just caught on that this little collection of branches would be the tree this year. 

Their lower lips hung down when I said, “Nope.” Like the mother hen story, I do most of the work. I put the tree together, fluff the bent branches, string lights on, and decorate the thing. “That’s nice” is their comment. 

Then, when Christmas is no more, I tackle the tree again (in reverse). Women, you know the dance. Remove and pack the bulbs, etc., gently unstring the lights, disassemble the tree, put the parts in bags, and store it away. Vacuum. Put everything back like before.

Are you with me, women?

You should have seen their faces. “Wahhhhh,” they seemed to be saying. “Is that little thing the tree? Nooo. The tree has to be the center of all,” they complained. 

Tsk Tsk. Poor guys. Suddenly aware.

Soon after they made these remarks, I made my move. I gave in. Yes, I did. That’s me, “Heap Big Smoke and No Fire!”

Without telling them, I drove downtown, spied a fake tree at Ace Hardware with the lights already fastened on the branches, and bought it. It was half price, and all assembled, so how could I do any better, right? 

Now, since I have given away all my family tree trinkets to granddaughter Faustina, I will have to dig to find ornaments. We may have to string popcorn or cranberries. And to think, just yesterday I was in Hobby Lobby watching women buy tree ornaments, and I felt so smug and ahead of the game ... “I don’t have to do that any more,” I mused.

Pride goes before the fall.

Speaking of Hobby Lobby, I was in Wichita to meet a plane, you see. And several friends asked me to pick up some food supplies for them at Costco. Sure. I love to spend other people’s money. 

While running around in Wichita, I guess they tried to call me. I know Fred did. My phone wouldn’t ring. I checked out the settings. Then I didn’t get a call from my son after his plane landed. I kept checking the phone. Why wouldn’t it ring? 

You’ll never guess. I didn’t even think of it until later, in the night. Guess why it wouldn’t ring? Did you guess? ... Well, I had it muted. Gee. Is this a sign of being in my 70s, almost 80s? I guess it must be. 

I texted one of my friends to tell her that I couldn’t find the things that she wanted me to get. Spell check said, “I couldn’t find your tongs.”  At least spell check didn’t say “thongs.” 

My tree gets delivered in two days, standing upright, lights on! This time the “guys” will be more appreciative and notice more this year because they know that their “tree” fantasy almost ended.

Judi Tabler lives in Pawnee County and is a guest columnist for the Great Bend Tribune. She can be reached at juditabler@gmail.com.