I have been thinking about Christmas gifts, and although I have most of my shopping done, I usually save the hardest for the last. Do you identify?

And the hardest? Shopping for Fred.

Shopping for the female of the species is easy. Let’s face it, men. Women like everything, cologne, candles, diamonds, new clothes (with the receipts enclosed so that they can exchange), a day at the spa, a new labor saving appliance, jewelry.

But buying for men is a monumental challenge. Unless that gift is hobby directed, golf accessories, grilling tools, fishing poles, hunting gear, or relates to sports somehow, there are not too many other options. A pair of socks, a tie, underwear, not too enticing! While trying to think up something different for “him” even the best shopper’s brain turns to mush. 

One thing I know. Men like gifts. Everyone likes to be remembered, including Fred. He opens his gifts, gives hugs and then eventually carries them to the dresser in the bedroom. Those gifts remain there until I can find a place for them, usually on his closet shelf ... unless they are edible of course. 

So, to help us all be more creative, I have searched out some probable male gift ideas. 

How about a gift of laughter for the guy who has everything he needs? “Fish Flops” are big right now. Remember the singing bass? Well, he’s back. The new version of “flopping fish” sports a set of fresh manicured toes poking out from the kisser of a large-mouth bass.

Or a book? The perfect gift for the philosopher in your life could be a bird book called “Guide to Troubled Birds.” Or here is another dandy hint. How about some magnets? Animal Butt Magnets are hot, dog butts, cat butts, whale butts.

Or, a toy? An Air Pix Flying Camera captures pictures with a camera that flies up to 20 meters in the air. It is popular but in limited supply.   

Hey, I am trying. These might not end up on the dresser in the bedroom.

Consider some unusual gadgets. The “Survival Lighter” produces a windproof, waterproof flame. It will stay lit even under running water! Wow.  The star gazer might like a mini telescope known as a “Starscope Monocular,” perfect for the night owl-type. Or try the Neck Relaxer which stimulates and massages muscles around the neck (This suggestion would definitely end up on the dresser) 

Food and drink are definitely winners. Special steaks? Exotic baked potatoes? Beer? Beer nuts? Lobster? A special Scotch? Or how about introducing some new snack treat? 

Passes to the local theater, or restaurant, a gift certificate to a farm store, or a “Cabellas” might work. (It will force him to select something he likes. That will torment him!)

These are my best leads. I am still in a quandary. I may end up buying some fishing lures, a new minnow pail, or a big bag of Gummy Worms.  But if in any way, I have helped you, then please let me know. 

Judi Tabler lives in Pawnee County and is a guest columnist for the Great Bend Tribune. She can be reached at juditabler@gmail.com or juditabler@awomansview.