Life imitates a Monty Python sketch:
An unnamed Danish man traveled to Vienna, Austria, for a trial on his lawsuit against the man who had sold him a defective cockatoo for the equivalent of about $15,000.
In a demonstration for the judge in the courtroom’s hallway, the bird flew “lopsided,” with the probable cause (according to the purchaser) chronic gout.
The judge’s decision was not reported.
But
did
whitey
win?
The Green Party is occasionally criticized for its over representation of whites and upper-income people, who are less likely to flinch at the added costs of environmental protections.
Last year, the Green Party candidate for governor of Illinois, Rich Whitney, was shocked to see that the sample ballot for the November election mistakenly displayed his name as “Rich Whitey.”
Corrections were made in time for election day.
Get
a job
you
loser!   
Darren Suchon, 42 and unemployed — and usually home all day — was charged in October with reckless driving and assault, among other things, for allegedly running his girlfriend off the road in his zeal to catch her after she drove away with his Sony PlayStation console.
She had just left for work, and Suchon weaved through traffic in Palmerton, Pa., then bumped her car when he caught up with her at a traffic light, forcing her off the road.
According to witnesses, Suchon rushed the car, “clawing” at it, screaming that he would “break the (expletive) window” if he didn’t get his game back. (Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa Fla. 33679 or go to www.newsoftheweird.com.)