BREAKING
LSH escapee caught in Utah
LARNED — Escaped sex offender John Freeman Colt, who walked out of the Sexual Predator Treatment Program of Larned State Hospital on June 30, has been captured in Utah.
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Stop the presses, please!
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Enterprising reporters get stories by earning the trust of their sources, which Simon Eroro of the Post-Courier (Port Moresby, Papua New Guinea) obviously did.
At a banquet, the News Limited (Rupert Murdoch’s empire) awarded Eroro its “Scoop of the Year” honor for reporting on militant tribal fighters of the Free West Papua movement — a scoop he had to earn by agreeing to undergo a ritual circumcision, with bamboo sticks, to prove his sincerity.
‘Kids’
should
be grounded
An Illinois appeals court finally threw out a lawsuit, but not before the two-year-long battle had created a foot-high pile of legal filings on whether two “children” (now ages 23 and 20) could sue their mother for bad parenting while they were growing up.
Among the claims were mom’s failure to send birthday cards or “care” packages during the kids’ college years and calling her daughter at midnight to ask that she return home from a party (and once failing to take the girl to a car show).
Another
nuisance
suit
makes news 
Todd Remis, an unemployed stock-market research analyst, filed a lawsuit in 2009 against the photographer of his 2003 wedding, citing breach of contract because the 400 shots taken during the ceremony failed to cover several key moments, such as the “last dance.”
A New York Times report pointed out that Remis is demanding not just the return of his $4,100, but for the photographer to pay for re-creating the missing scenes by covering travel expenses for all 40 guests to reconvene.
Remis and his wife have divorced.
She has returned to her native Latvia, and Remis does not even know how to contact her.
(Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa Fla. 33679 or go to www.newsoftheweird.com.)