I remember back some 20 years ago when I waited for my “Readers’ Digest” in the mail.
I enjoyed saving the jokes for bedtime; I would fluff up my pillows, lean back, read the jokes, and laugh out loud. Nothing was more refreshing than a good laugh at bedtime.
I still laugh at jokes in the Reader’s Digest, but those times are few and far between.
I am reading the humor on the internet now, and most of the time, the jokes I read go in and out of my brain so fast that I don’t retain what I have read. The jokes are funny, but the glut of information and the glut of clever-isms has caused brain overload.
However, I re-read these “Great Truths” today in my notes, and these quips resonated with me. I laughed. And I related.
See if they speak to you. I have selected the best ones for our enjoyment.
GREAT TRUTHS YOUNG CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED.
• No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats.
• When your mom is upset at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
• If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back. They always catch the second person.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED
• Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
• Wrinkles don’t hurt.
• Families are like fudge — mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
• Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.
• Laughing is good exercise. It’s like jogging on the inside.
• Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
• Growing old is mandatory — growing up is optional.
• Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
• When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you’re down.
• It’s frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
• Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
• Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE
• You believe in Santa Claus
• You don’t believe in Santa Claus
• You are Santa Claus
• You look like Santa Claus
SUCCESS: How true this one is.
• At age 4 success is — Not piddling in your pants
• At age 12 success is — Having friends.
• At age 16 success is — Having a driver’s license
• At age 35 success is — Having money
• At age 50 success is — Having money
• At age 70 success is — Having a driver’s license
• At age 75 success is — Having friends
• At age 80 success is — Not piddling in your pants.
• Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.
Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way, but NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.
“A Woman’s View” is Judi Tabler’s reflection of her experiences and events. She is a wife, mother, writer, teacher, grandmother, and even a great grandmother. Contact Annie at pprarieannie@gmailcom